other stuff



other stuff

April 1st, 2007 by dreamlistener


he said she was begging him to help — saying there was no-one on the face of the earth that could help her now. that she was going to die.

what’s a person supposed to do with that?

he has helped her before, brought her to live with him before, given her clean cloths, a shower, lodging, food, smokes. but this time he said he just couldn’t help her. he said he just couldn’t.
she has been on the street for five years and now no shelter will take her in. she is barred. she is too disruptive.
it is a cycle. she is on the street, she becomes mentally and physically ill, she is taken to the hospital, she is cleaned up, she is kept until she is well “enough,” she is found a room, she is discharged, she goes to the room, she “pisses away her money on booze,” she is evicted, she is on the street.

he told me it’s really hard for him to watch someone go down like that.

2 Responses to “other stuff”

  1. endlesslyredonoursnow Says:
    April 4th, 2007 at 11:41 pm eIt’s really hard to stop drinking. And hard to let someone hurt themself. I don’t know what to say.Is it still Chris you’re talking about?
  2. dreamlistener Says:
    April 6th, 2007 at 5:37 pm eyes. he himself was feeling so distraught and torn by this encounter i am afraid it really brought him down. i haven’t seen him since.to be placed in that kind of position must be so fundamentally difficult. most of us get to walk by, but because he is so close to her reality himself, he is called upon in a very personal and direct way. like watching someone drown knowing you can’t swim well enough to save you both.

    and really, what can we say to that?

out of place

March 16th, 2007 by dreamlistener


on my way to the st. james drop-in centre I pass by a strip of sidewalk next to the bay where homeless people hang out. for the last two months I have walked by a girl who sits on a piece of cardboard, back against the wall, legs stretched out, with three bags placed neatly alongside her. I feel such a tug walking by her because the girl seems so alone… and out of place. she is dressed warmly, sometimes with a blanket over her legs, a hat, a scarf– she appears to be well cared for. but today after I passed her I went back and squatted down near her and asked if I could help. then realizing she spoke french I asked her again, in french, if there was something I could do for her. I was looking right into her eyes, and I had an odd feeling because her eyes were clear and warm and reminded me of my little sister, and in fact she could have been. I think she is young, in her late teens, early twenties at the most. she replied, “no.” afterwards I realized I had asked the wrong question, so next time I see her I am going to go back into the bay and buy one hot chocolate and one cappuccino, one slice of banana bread and one muffin and I will ask her which she prefers. it’s not so much I think she is hungry, I just want her to know I know she is there. I hope whatever it is that she needs she finds.


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